| I couldn't believe my own eyes when I found this guy! I was lucky to be there to capture it all! |
| Mostly photography and traditional drawings. Check 'em out! |
| My name is Simon and I was born on October 6th 1984. I can curse in both french and english perfectly. I believe we can divide my life in 3 parts, all of them bearing different traumatic events which led me to become severely idiotic over time. 1- !!!Childhood!!! - During preschool, I created a game called "The Caca". I was the "caca" and I was trying to turn others into a "caca" by traveling through suspended tires that I labelled as "toilet seats". - At 8 years old, I found a booger in my ear. - Near this time, I founded the PWF ( Plush Wrestling Federation ). This most professional federation included all of my plush toys. I was also a wrestler ( and the best in my category ). I would count victories, defeats and draws. The fights would take place on my bed. Sometimes there were tag team matches, hardcore matches and even royal rumbles. At some point, I was in a huge feud with my biggest plush toy ( a black panther ) which even led me to my first defeat. I retired from this league at the honorable age of 17 years old with a most impressive collection of world titles ( all made out of paperboard ). 2- !!!Teenage Years!!! - Near 1999, I was one, if not the best player of a PC game titled "Populous 3: The Beginning" to the point that I had to create multiple accounts in order to play against people who wouldn't want me to beat them. I am so proud of saying this. - At 12 years old, I met a girl who was hitting on me really hard. While I was walking back home after school, she would always accompany me and since I was such an idiot, I didn't even notice that she liked me. I only noticed it when she stopped it and it was too late. - Once again, at 12, since I was highly unsatisfied with the previous girl, I decided to have sex with Mother Earth itself by digging a hole on the ground. It was better than I had thought. I see it as my "first time", actually. - At 13, I was caught in a love triangle with two girls. It was hell... and it was fabulous. I ended up messing both of these relationships with great efficiency once again! - At 17 years old, I was having fun at my friend's when suddenly I had an urgent need to pee. I went to the bathroom at full speed and smashed my face right on the door ( which was closed, obviously ). I destroyed most of what was inside my nose at this very instance and required surgery ( I can only breathe from one nostril at a time, now ). - I was a Kurt Cobain and Nirvana fanatic. At Kurt's 5th death anniversary, I spent a whole night listening to his albums without stopping. That was enough for me to HATE Nirvana afterwards ( although my hate is now leaving room for what I would call "disdain" ). 3- !!!ADULTHOOD!!! - The worst event so far ( besides "that story" involving a squirrel which I will not mention ) is when I almost died in 2007. I was at the hospital and I had multiple hallucinations, both frightening and reassuring. I saw Cthulhu, Jesus Christ and the Virgin Mary, crazy toons from the 1920s who would murder each other using extremely violent means, gigantic clowns, warriors, dragons and dark lords and finally dogs eating other dogs eating other dogs in a "neverending dog eating fest". !!! OTHER CRAZY STUFF !!! Beliefs: - The power of dreams - The after-life - Extra-terrestrial life - UFOs - Occultism - Spring-Heeled Jack ( a grotesque and horrid jumping man who would slap people on the face and laugh in a most maniacal manner ) - Reincarnation ( for many years now I have personally acknowledged that I once was an American man who lived during the 30s,40s and 50s. I also believe that I have been some sort of warrior - or a murderer in Mongolia many centuries ago. I could explain why, but it would be long and boring. Fears: - E.T., yes, "THE" E.T. you know. He freaks me out. When I was a child, I saw the film and I went crazy because of that scene when Elliot sees him for the first time. E.T. has always made me extremely uncomfortable in a manner I would compare to someone putting a knife right under your throat. For real. I am not kidding. I am scared by E.T. and no one believes me when I say so. This is my only true phobia. - UFOs. I frequently have dreams of UFOs ( about once a month ). Almost all of them occur near our cottage ( which I find even more disturbing ). Although the scenario is always different, I am usually hit by a beam coming from the UFO and find myself paralysed. I am a confessed stargazer and I always watch for moving lights as I watch the stars. I believe in UFOs more than you could imagine. The most disturbing fact about me: I love blonde girls. I cannot love dark haired girls. At all. I do not trust them. I have a thing for blonde girls and I've always had. Why? It's all Betty Cooper's fault. Yes. Betty from the Archie comics. When I was young, I read a lot of Archie comics and I guess I ended up seeing Betty Cooper as the perfect girl. She does sports, gets involved with society, bakes stuff and isn't asking for much. I always hated Archie for going out with Veronica instead. I believe that if I would be a character in Archie, I would actually kill that guy. I would also harass Dilton. Sexually. |
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" When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace. "
~ Jimi Hendrix
Genre là : [link]
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" When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace. "
~ Jimi Hendrix
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Online Portfolio: [link]
Online Portfolio: [link]
Wisdom?: [link]
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"I'll moider da bum."
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blog: [link]
flickr: [link]
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Comment back, it's polite and shows that you appreatiate everyone's comments on your work!
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Avatar by ~Makiling
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Comment back, it's polite and shows that you appreatiate everyone's comments on your work!
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Ricardo Martins | Graphic + Web Designer
My Portfolio | Flickr
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I'm just a teenage dirtbag.
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